A Blessing in Disguise.. :)

Well.. what I'm talking about? Hmm.. I'm referring to this book that I just bought through eBay called 'He's Just Not That Into You', written by the editor & creator of Sex and The City, Liz & Greg. Know what, after reading the first few chapters of the book, I completely lose faith in guys ( abang Ed to be specific).. because U see, this book is about how guys came up with all sort of excuses when infact what they are really saying they are just not into us. And ada banyak laa contoh2 situation and excuses yg guys selalu bagi.

It's not like Ed fits into any of the category, but of course I can't help wondering.. I mean like, mcm phone calls.. he doesn't call me as often as Yan. Tapi dia ada reason, because he hasn't start working yet.. tapi bila dia ada credit, he'll actually spend all his credit calling me. He even apologized to me for not being able to call me that often & said if dia kerja nanti, mmg he'll call me more often. So, anyways, back to the book, after reading the book.. I was like 'should I believe excuse abang Ed( yang mmg sah2 betul)' or 'should i percaya what the authors said.. that if a guy mmg into a lady, he'll do anything to be with you and makes u happy'.. tu laa benda yg memeningkan kepala. In my head, I was like.. if abang Ed mmg so into me he'll find a way to call me everyday.. tapi kan I think lak, camne dia nak dpt duit? Nak mintak kat abang or his parents ke? Duit2 yg dia dpt to top-up pun is from abang dia.. and mcm laa abang dia bermurah hati nak bagi duit setiap masa? And of course I xnak dia menyusahkan diri pegi mintak duit kat mak bapak everyday.. That was what I think before I read the book. Sigh..

Anyway, 2 days ago.. while we were talking on the phone.. I saja2 cakap to him that I've been reading this book.. and when he heard the title he was like 'Oh, I know that book.. I just read the review in the newspaper 3 weeks ago'.. the next thing he said was asking me not to trust the book completely because he felt the book is being unfair to guys ( there's a few extracts from the book in the review.. so basically he knows what the book is about).. pastu I pun confessed to him how the book made me not wanting to trust guys again and how confused & upset I felt after reading it.. I was like 'baru2 start new year je, dah buat I lose hope.. kecewa je..' after hearing that, dia cakap 'tu laa.. kan I dah cakap jgn percaya 100% with the book, right now U just have to follow your intuition'.. then i answered 'i pun dah x tau apa intuition i sekarang' .. and know wat dia cakap lepas tu? he said 'ima, i x tau about other guys.. tapi I know I've been completely honest to you and you just have to trust me with this..' and then i was like.. oh, ok. although feeling quite dissatisfied with the answer, I decided that I should just forget abt it and talk about other things...

So, we continue talking about other stuff when suddenly tiba2 both of us senyap for a few minutes.. no one talks until he finally decided to break the silence .. he asked me what I was talking about, and I said I was wondering what he was thinking about when we weren't talking.. tiba2 he suggest that the both of us said what actually was on our mind.. I asked him to said it first, and he agreed. He said what was going on his mind is how much he couldn't wait to see me sebab dia nak make things sure & secured for me.. sbb dia cakap dia xnak things to another level before we met each other.. that's why he just can't wait til I get back to Malaysia so that we can move on... and mmg panjang gila dia explain, but I just pendekkan je kat sini.. dah x ingat apa dia cakap :p anyway, when my time comes.. I was like quite hessitant to say what I was really thinking.. tapi bila dah 5 minutes dok pikir2, i decided to be honest. I said 'what I was thinking just now is just what a wonderful person you are and I mcm pikir.. ya allah, dia ni x sedar ke betapa adorable dia nie.. buat I sayang'.. when he heard that, he was like 'Gosh, that's exactly what I've been thinking about you.. ever since the first few messages that we exchanged thru friedster..kadang2 i fikir, U're just too good to be true. tapi U know laa kan, like what I said just now.. I nak U sure betul2 about me before we make it official, I nak you see me first.. face to face. Tapi sebenarnya I pikir jugak.. kenapa nak rush into something yang dah memang sure'... hmm, tiba2 satu ayat tu buat I berpikir, smthng yg dah sure? what does he mean with that? i mean, i think i got what he means but I'm not really sure whether we're thinking abt the same thing or not..tapi rasanya betul kan? :)

then ada satu part ni he was telling me this story about a weirdo man yg buat suara manja kat dia on the phone.. pastu ntah camne tiba2 dia cakap suara i manja.. and I jokingly said to him 'alaa.. i think the man yang u call tu mesti dpt kalahkan manja i' .. then he replied ' ish, lagi tu manja.. buat i rasa takut.. tapi U punya manja, buat I sayang..' :) :) that's exactly what he said. he has even planned where he want to take me to eat and dia dah plan nak simpan duit from now sbb nak take me out for our date bila I balik malaysia nanti. tapi yang paling I rasa terharu when he said he's planning to stop smoking when he found out that all the guys that I'm close to tak smoke. and i swear, i x pernah suggest or hint pun! i was like 'jgn laa buat because of me, i nak you do it out of ur own willingness.. but if u nak stop, mmg i'm behind you 110%..' pastu he said 'yes, i want to do it. lagipun tgk history before pun.. semua guys yg dpt close with you x smoke.. i pun xnak smoke' isn't he a sweetie? :) dah la siap cakap 'I mmg x suka drive laju2.. apatah lagi if I tgh bawak you, mesti I bawak at 40k/h.. hahaha.. x berjalan kereta tu'... and somehow what he said tu, reminds me of what Mode said to me dulu2.. he said when a guy is really into a girl, he'd ensure her safety at all times, contohnya masa dia tgh drive. So, yes.. I've actually found someone who do exactly that even before I asked him! How do I feel? Obviously I feel great! :) :)

U know how long we talked on the phone that night? 10 HOURS! yups, tu pun kena stop sbb both of us dah run out of credit, if not.. i think it will be waaaay longer :) maybe 24 hours? who knows? LOL..

sigh.. when I told Jun about this.. she was like 'iMa, this is like a dream come true! I'm sooo happy for you'.. yes.. indeed. it is a dream come true :) God just works in mysterious ways..isn't it a wonder.. x pernah terpikir that I would end up like this with the guy who I've had a huge crush on when I was 15, and who I thought was out of my league at that time...*sigh* :) what makes it even better is how he repeatedly said that how talking to me bring peace & comfort to him ( because that's exactly how he made me feel!) .. to hear he felt the same thing, makes me even more sure of his feelings for me... i can't wait to go back to Malaysia and do all the things that we've planned together :) i'm sooooooo the jiwang2 now. I know. Don't need to remind me.. :p